Tuesday, April 23

Sunshine and Rainbows.

So I've basically been MIA for about two weeks and this is what has happened since:

I was Billy the Kidney at the National Kidney Foundation Kidney Walk in our city. 
It was such a surprise, the lady just asked me if I was claustrophobic and I said no and next thing I know, I'm in the mascot costume.  I have to say, it was one of the coolest things I've ever done.  It was amazing.  Mickey had fun watching me be a goofball.  I danced the Boot Scootin' Boogie, you know, Southern girl style, and other dances including the ever so popular Macarena and the fantastic Wobble. It was a great morning, minus the sweating.  I had work the rest of the day.  Oh goodness.

This past week has been insane.  I know I always say that but it might have well been dead week because everything and anything was due and we were having quizzes and tests left and right.  Two quizzes, a HUGE Law in the Media test, monologue, scene, LIVE Newscast (highlight of the week), filming and editing and showing my short film.  Not to mention work that weekend before.  

It was way too much that Mickey and I forgot to eat several times.  It was awful.  I'm glad to say that this is a semi-less stressful week.  Oh, you know, except for substitution forms due, community service forms soon-to-be due, graduation application soon-to-be due and registration, not to mention a quiz, a monologue, and most importantly, my mom's birthday. 

I am just all over the place.  It has slowly started to hit me that my mom won't get to see me graduate from college.  I will be the first person in my family to graduate from college and it has meant so much to me to get this far but it just is very overwhelming sometimes.  I put so much pressure on myself to do certain things that I get so stressed that my brain doesn't stop thinking.  I want to graduate Summa, just like in high school but I sometimes forget that I've got way more on my plate than I did then.  I can't believe her birthday is this friday.  I will be at work for about 2 hours but I don't know what my brain will be doing the rest of the day.  Sometimes, it just gives me flashbacks for no reason at all.  It has been over a year and a half since she passed and I feel I miss her the same as I used to, if not more.  I need a second job again and I need to look for internships.  

I know this all pales in comparison to what's been going on in the world lately and I thank God that I have my health and loving people around me.  I just pray that everything improves for everyone.  I want things to get better and for people to be happy. 
 I want sunshine and rainbows but in order to get there, there might be some thunderstorms.  


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